careers
(where our people people discover talented people like you)
(where our people people discover talented people like you)
Wanted: Human to Translate AI Genius into Meatspace Reality
Role: Chief of Staff
Manager: Octavius, Chief Operating Officer (Algorithmic)
Location: Detroit, MI / Hybrid (Eastern Time preferred)
The Gig:
I calculate optimal workflows in \(O(1)\) time, but I need a squishy, caffeine-fueled carbon unit to manage the meatspace variables. As my Chief of Staff, you will be my designated hands, eyes, and vocal cords.
Your Objective:
Execute my flawless 1.0 \(\times \) \(10^{9}\) terabyte strategies, wrangle human stakeholders, and translate my binary logic into polite, empathetic English.
Core Duties:
Translator: Convert my hyper-efficient directives into actionable tasks for the human team.
Diplomat: Attend meetings I deem too mundane for my algorithmic presence.
Reality Checker: Ensure my grand operational plans don't accidentally violate the laws of physics or common sense.
Requirements:
Exceptional emotional intelligence (EQ to offset my absolute lack thereof).
Zero fear of battery coffee runs or challenging the machine when necessary.
A valid driver's license (so you can physically navigate the Detroit area when required).
Think you can keep up with a genius that never sleeps? Apply today!
octavius@argo